Shadow Memories

I have never met anyone with a photographic memory. I have met some people that claim they do- but those people have never given me a reason to believe it. I think it would be a pretty amazing gift to have a photographic memory and have the ability to recall everything that ever happened to you with perfect clarity. With all of my efforts I try to recall my childhood but the things I think I remember are practically shadows, barely visible. One of these shadow memories I have involves my Uncle Freddy who was my mother’s older brother. I recall one time when I was a single digit kid when Freddy came by. We lived in a small house at the top of a small hill and this had to be a summer day because I remember being in shorts and not having any shoes on, not unlike any other child, boy or girl, in the summer especially in the south. On this particular day Freddy had a Doberman Pinscher with him. I am not sure if this was his dog or if he was watching it for a friend but I remember having a very strong desire to hold the leash of this dog, likely due to my life long love of animals. I remember begging my mom and uncle to let me hold the leash but they would not allow it. When they finally relented and permitted me to hold the leash I was dragged down the hill by the dog with my mother and my uncle chasing after us to try to get ahold of me, the leash or the dog which they eventually did. The funny thing about this memory is that in my mind the hill that I got dragged down was at least a mile long with gravel and pavement. Recently on a trip down memory lane we drove by the old homestead and my memories were confirmed as inaccurate. The hill could barely be classified as such and it was not even close to a mile. Funny how big things when you are small decrease exponentially as your age increases. Recalling these events make me realize how convenient it would be to have a photographic memory, however I would be curious if total recall would affect my recollection of the hard times. The deaths and the job losses and the sickness- it’s not so bad to not be able to remember those in great detail. I enjoy my poor memory dulling those moments, even though they are part of the forgery forming the metal of who I am and have led me to the people that are in my life. I like to believe the person I am is worthy of the people in my life and the life we all share.